Seriously,don't read this if you have something else to do.
Forewarned is forearmed.
A fly suddenly plunged into the pile of garbage,dispersing its flies friends away from the garbage can.The group of flies slowly returned to the pile,gathering around the fly that had just recently crashed by.Removing its head from the pile,Mas the fly burst into a shout.
Mas :Everyone,Ryan is caught by a monster!
Fly 1 : Oh no!What must we do?!
Fly 2 :We must do what we always do.We let the death fly by.
Fly 3 :But he might be still not dead.We must go and save him!Let's go.
Fly 4+n! :Let's go!
So the flies spoke in unison,agreed to save the fly caught by the monster.
Mas :Wait!We must have a plan.This is not simply a human,but it's his monster.A VACUUM MACHINE!
Fly 4+n! :A VACUUM MACHINE?!
Mas :Yes.Even at our speed of 8 km/h,we wouldn't be able to beat this monster.It can suck all the air around it,and with the sound it creates,it will send fear to your spine.Or rather thorax.The mere sight of it would make my my basiscota weak and my wings beat haplessly,turning into fragile papers.I swear if you..
Fly 5 :Excuse me Mas but..
Mas :What?!Don't interrupt me when I'm storytelling.
Fly 5 :I'm sorry but I think we need to save Ryan.I already have a plan.
Mas :Fine.Let us hear the plan.
Fly 5 :Here is the design of the monster.It consist of three different parts.The first part is known as the engine.It is basically the part that supplies energy to this monster.The second part is the container,also known as..
So the flies listened.Or so it seems.
Mas :You there!Don't sleep.I saw you close one of your eyes.
Fly 10 :I was not!
Mas :Yes you were!
Fly 10 : Damn wrong I was not.Besides,I still have a lot of eyes left.
Mas : See.You just said you did it.
Fly 10 : No I didn't.Shut up maggot!
Mas : Look who's talking.I'm older than you,maggot.
Fly 10 : Older?1 second that is.
Fly 5 : Flies,please don't brew storm in a teacup.
Fly 1 : Did someone said something about food?
Fly 4+n! : Food!
Fly 2 : There's enough food here.Let us eat.
Fly 4+n! : Let's!
So the flies continued to eat in the garbage can as Ryan was stuck in the vacuum cleaner,trying to figure why it was so dark and dusty.
Fly 1 :Listen people.I can hear something.But I can't remember what it could be.
Fly 5 : I have a plan of it here,describing about the thing that make the noise but I can't remember what it is.
Fly 3 : Hmm.I think we must save something from this sound.
Mas : I think I've seen it before,but I can't remember it too.Look!My wings looks like an origami paper.Wow,cool!What can this sound be?
Fly 2 : Oh that.That is the VACUUM MACHINE you've all been talking about.
Fly 1 : VACUUM MACHINE?
Fly 5 : VACUUM MACHINE?!
Fly 3 : VACUUM MACHINE?!
Mas : VACUUM MACHINE?!
Fly 4+n!: VACUUM MACHINE.Yea!Let's!
And they were all sucked into the monster.
Ryan :Hi guys.What's up?
The end.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Snow White
As requested by Ibtisam.There are two version of these,but in the end it was decided that this one was to be published.
"Once upon a time a Queen gave birth to a baby girl in the middle of winter,a very fair child with skins as white as snow and lips red as blood.
The king was suffering from frostbite when the baby was born,thus decided to name his first newborn Snowbite.The Queen however didn't agree with the name and only called her daughter by the name Snow.That is until Snowbite was three years old when the Queen suddenly fell ill to an unknown disease.Lying on her deathbed,the Queen requested the King's favor.
"For my dying wish,I would like our daughter name to be changed to Snow White.Will you do that,love?"
"..." mumbled the king.
"Pardon?!I could not hear you."
"I will try."
"Thank you.That is better.Now I can rest in peace."
A man of superstition,the king abidingly changed her daughter's name and by Snow White was she known hence after.Growing up without a mother,Snow was lavished with attention and devoted love by the King, and she consequently grew up to be a spoiled little princess.One that whims have to be satisfied at no condition,only second to the King.Her pampered life however took a change one usual evening.
The King held a ball to celebrate Snow's 14th's birthday and invited all the nobles and aristocrats to the function.On this fateful occasion,the King happened to see a very beautiful young lady,a daughter to a lord,so stunning that the King instantly went gaga over her.A few days not long after the new Queen was announced to the people,thus Snow finally had a step-mother.With a beauty at his side,the King's attention to her daughter began to wane,little by little.What's more,the new Queen had such nice manners that the servants cannot help but to compare Snow White to her step-mother.Although Snow's command were followed to the dot,it was then done with such repugnant faces clearly implying their new adorement to the Queen and their dislike of the Princess antics.
Thus Snow White had less and less people to play with,that one day she went to the Queen's room out of boredom.Her stepmother however was not in the room,only her old dog was to be seen.It was rumored that the dog was her Majesty's pet since the Queen was a little girl,one that man could not doubt by a taking a glimpse on the dog.The elderly dog was the Queen's closest companion,so it was a natural reaction when the Queen was enraged when she came to her room and saw Snow White riding the dog like a horse,with its stomach on the floor and its front leg pulling its body helplessly.All the while Snow White shouted for the poor dog to move faster and faster," Giddy up!",when suddenly she felt a hot pang on her left cheek.
(Haha.The brat got slap!Oh wait,I'll change the tone back.)
Snow White was stunned being slapped that she rushed out of the room,down the stone steps and out of the castle where she cried.However it was not long before she reasoned the Queen was at fault,followed by Snow White scheming to get back on the Queen.
"It's not my fault.That dog really look like a horse.In fact,i think it's probably a horse,or maybe.Wait till I get to you,"she muttered to herself when she suddenly saw a cow.
"A cow!Wow!Wow a cow!"
Again she rode the cow like the dog but this time it ran very fast.She was having fun when suddenly she turn around and saw farmers running towards her that Snow White shouted,
"Faster,faster!You don' t want to be a sausage do you cow?"
But the cow instead slowed down and stopped.It fell and threw Snow White of its back,before lying on the ground motionless.
The farmers were simply furious so Snow White ran for her life.Shortly she arrived at an apple orchard,where she quickly hide up in an apple tree.The apples were ripe so Snow White plucked one and it was simply delicious(stolen food,simply so),that she finally ate a whole lot of them.Even long after the farmers were gone she didn't stop,not until her stomach ached so bad that she couldn't climbed down from the tree.In the end she fainted and fell safely(damn it!) from the tree.
Meanwhile the kind-hearted Queen was worried sick that she finally used her magic mirror.
"Mirror,mirror on the wall;
Where's the little naughty gal," said the Queen.(Fine!I changed it a bit).
As a conclusion the Queen found Snow White by my help and took her back to the palace.Afterwards Snow White seem more well-behaved and reserved.One would say she learned her lesson,that she was then a grown princess with perfect demeanor and fine character.
But NO!
When her father and step-mother went to live peacefully in the mountain,there she went making up a cock and bull story of her and the seven dwarfs.Every bit of it is a lie,even the little men.
Everything except one thing that is.
And how would I know all this?
Well I'm that one thing that is real from the 'original' Snow White story you have been corrupted with.
So who am I?
No.No prize for correct guesses."
"Once upon a time a Queen gave birth to a baby girl in the middle of winter,a very fair child with skins as white as snow and lips red as blood.
The king was suffering from frostbite when the baby was born,thus decided to name his first newborn Snowbite.The Queen however didn't agree with the name and only called her daughter by the name Snow.That is until Snowbite was three years old when the Queen suddenly fell ill to an unknown disease.Lying on her deathbed,the Queen requested the King's favor.
"For my dying wish,I would like our daughter name to be changed to Snow White.Will you do that,love?"
"..." mumbled the king.
"Pardon?!I could not hear you."
"I will try."
"Thank you.That is better.Now I can rest in peace."
A man of superstition,the king abidingly changed her daughter's name and by Snow White was she known hence after.Growing up without a mother,Snow was lavished with attention and devoted love by the King, and she consequently grew up to be a spoiled little princess.One that whims have to be satisfied at no condition,only second to the King.Her pampered life however took a change one usual evening.
The King held a ball to celebrate Snow's 14th's birthday and invited all the nobles and aristocrats to the function.On this fateful occasion,the King happened to see a very beautiful young lady,a daughter to a lord,so stunning that the King instantly went gaga over her.A few days not long after the new Queen was announced to the people,thus Snow finally had a step-mother.With a beauty at his side,the King's attention to her daughter began to wane,little by little.What's more,the new Queen had such nice manners that the servants cannot help but to compare Snow White to her step-mother.Although Snow's command were followed to the dot,it was then done with such repugnant faces clearly implying their new adorement to the Queen and their dislike of the Princess antics.
Snow White was a pariahdom in her own kingdom.
Thus Snow White had less and less people to play with,that one day she went to the Queen's room out of boredom.Her stepmother however was not in the room,only her old dog was to be seen.It was rumored that the dog was her Majesty's pet since the Queen was a little girl,one that man could not doubt by a taking a glimpse on the dog.The elderly dog was the Queen's closest companion,so it was a natural reaction when the Queen was enraged when she came to her room and saw Snow White riding the dog like a horse,with its stomach on the floor and its front leg pulling its body helplessly.All the while Snow White shouted for the poor dog to move faster and faster," Giddy up!",when suddenly she felt a hot pang on her left cheek.
(Haha.The brat got slap!Oh wait,I'll change the tone back.)
Snow White was stunned being slapped that she rushed out of the room,down the stone steps and out of the castle where she cried.However it was not long before she reasoned the Queen was at fault,followed by Snow White scheming to get back on the Queen.
"It's not my fault.That dog really look like a horse.In fact,i think it's probably a horse,or maybe.Wait till I get to you,"she muttered to herself when she suddenly saw a cow.
"A cow!Wow!Wow a cow!"
Again she rode the cow like the dog but this time it ran very fast.She was having fun when suddenly she turn around and saw farmers running towards her that Snow White shouted,
"Faster,faster!You don' t want to be a sausage do you cow?"
But the cow instead slowed down and stopped.It fell and threw Snow White of its back,before lying on the ground motionless.
The farmers were simply furious so Snow White ran for her life.Shortly she arrived at an apple orchard,where she quickly hide up in an apple tree.The apples were ripe so Snow White plucked one and it was simply delicious(stolen food,simply so),that she finally ate a whole lot of them.Even long after the farmers were gone she didn't stop,not until her stomach ached so bad that she couldn't climbed down from the tree.In the end she fainted and fell safely(damn it!) from the tree.
Meanwhile the kind-hearted Queen was worried sick that she finally used her magic mirror.
"Mirror,mirror on the wall;
Where's the little naughty gal," said the Queen.(Fine!I changed it a bit).
As a conclusion the Queen found Snow White by my help and took her back to the palace.Afterwards Snow White seem more well-behaved and reserved.One would say she learned her lesson,that she was then a grown princess with perfect demeanor and fine character.
But NO!
When her father and step-mother went to live peacefully in the mountain,there she went making up a cock and bull story of her and the seven dwarfs.Every bit of it is a lie,even the little men.
Everything except one thing that is.
And how would I know all this?
Well I'm that one thing that is real from the 'original' Snow White story you have been corrupted with.
So who am I?
No.No prize for correct guesses."
Monday, June 2, 2008
Pra-siar
It's in BM!Forgive me for all the stupid 'tatabahasa' mistake.And it isn't exactly a 'kerawang' either.
By the by,this is a parallel-story-to/ending-to a not yet written story.It wouldn't make any sense,but I'm afraid it would take too long until i write the whole story,so i wrote this part that I was afraid I was going to forget.
Tiga orang budak bertenggek di tepi kali,tapi seorang saja yang mengail.Naim yang paling kecil memegang kail,kail yang hampir sama tinggi dengannya,kemudian dia lontar umpan ke dalam air.
"Bosan la Naim," kata Amir.
"Agak a Naim.Aku dah lapar ni,"
"Ahh.Kau tak habis-habis makan Mat.Aku bosan bukan sebab tunggu ikan,tapi bosan asyik-asyik Naim yang lontar kail."
"Memang la.Dah aku punya kail," jawab Naim."Itu la,aku dah ckp jangan ikut.Aku dah agak nanti mesti kau bising."
"Aku tak kisah tunggu ikan,tapi bagi aku cuba lontar umpan pulak."
Naim menarik tali kailnya untuk meletak umpan baru,tanpa diendahnya ngomelan Amir.
"Weh.Buat tak dengar pulak.Kau jangan la berlagak sangat,kail rotan ja pon," Amir menambah.
"Kalau rotan saja pon,kenapa kau tak buat sendiri!?" Naim meninggi suara."Kau yang berlagak!"
"Ahh.Aku tak tahan dengan kau ni."Amir yang berbadan lebih besar mengambil kail Naim darinya,lalu di lontarnya mata kail ke air.Mat yang sebelum itu berbaring di atas tanah bangun dan melihat umpan itu pergi dan jatuh.Tepat di dalam rumpun pokok di tengah kali.
"Bodoh!Tengok apa kau dah buat!Mata kail tu dah sangkut.Baik kau pergi turun ambik."
Amir memalingkan badannya,melangkah meninggalkan dua orang budak itu.
"Bukan salah aku."
"Bodoh!" jerit Naim.
"Bukan salah aku" ulang Amir dari jauh.
Setelah di sumpahnya Amir,Naim cuba turun ke dalam kali.
"Mat,tolong aku kejap."
"Tak boleh la Naim.Mak aku suruh pergi kedai tadi," kata Mat sambil mengesat debu dari baju.
Naim mengeluh dan turun,diperhatikan Mat yang berdiri tetap di tepi tebing.Naim meredah perlahan-lahan,lumpur di dasar terkocak mengeruhkan air.Langsung tidak nampak kakinya,mahupun makhluk-makhluk di dalam air.Sedang Naim terpikirkan cerita tahyul dan tipu,terdengar dia suara dari tebing,lantas dia berpaling.
Mat masih berdiri dan menoleh serentak ke belakangnya.
Seorang lelaki kusut masai berdiri tegak.Badannya tegap tapi tidak terjaga,mukanya hitam dek berkeliaran di tengah hari tanpa keruan.Dia pun berkata,
"Tiada dapat ku kudap,namun apa kau mamah?
Biar di saring bagaimana,mana mungkin kita seiring langkah.
Patah buluh darahnya,baru disambung tali saudara"
"Okay la Naim.Aku balik dulu," cepat Mat melangkah menjauhi lelaki tersebut.Ikutkan hati,mahu saja Naim naik ikut tebing di hadapannya,tapi barangnya tertinggal di atas tebing di belakangnya,bersebelahan lelaki itu.Naim meredah balik,memanjat naik dan lelaki yang tadinya galak bersajak senyap sahaja.Melihatkan Naim susah untuk naik,lelaki tersebut menyuakan tangannya.Naim sambut pantas tapi cepat dia melepaskan tangannya dengan terkejut,hampir-hampir dia jatuh ke dalam kali.
"Mana jari kau?"terpacul soalan tersbut sebelum sempat Naim berfikir.
Lelaki itu merenung jari sendiri,kemudian perlahan-lahan riak muka dia berubah serius dan matanya kembali fokus.
"Aku hilang jari ni setahun dulu,tapi hari ini aku hilang lebih dari itu," jawab lelaki tersebut.Dilapnya muka sendiri,lelaki tersebut segera berjalan ke arah kampung."Aku pergi dulu."
"Kesian.."cakap Naim sendirian."Dah la gila,tak ada jari plak tu."
Naim tiba di rumah dan melihat emaknya tergesa-gesa bersiap.Ayahnya sudah lama siap dan pergi ke masjid.Namun selalu emaknya akan tinggal di rumah.Hanya kalau ada keramaian akan dia tinggalkan rumah,itupun di rangkainya Naim untuk ikut bersama.Lain pula hari ini.
"Naim.Nasi ada bawah tudung," emak Naim bercakap sambil bersiap.
"Tapi mak nak pergi mana?"
"Baca Yasin.Jangan lupa kunci rumah," pesan emaknya sambil menutup pintu.
"Baca sebab apa?" soal Naim,tapi soalannya itu tak terjawab,tidak sehingga dia teringatkan kata-kata lelaki gila tadi.
By the by,this is a parallel-story-to/ending-to a not yet written story.It wouldn't make any sense,but I'm afraid it would take too long until i write the whole story,so i wrote this part that I was afraid I was going to forget.
Tiga orang budak bertenggek di tepi kali,tapi seorang saja yang mengail.Naim yang paling kecil memegang kail,kail yang hampir sama tinggi dengannya,kemudian dia lontar umpan ke dalam air.
"Bosan la Naim," kata Amir.
"Agak a Naim.Aku dah lapar ni,"
"Ahh.Kau tak habis-habis makan Mat.Aku bosan bukan sebab tunggu ikan,tapi bosan asyik-asyik Naim yang lontar kail."
"Memang la.Dah aku punya kail," jawab Naim."Itu la,aku dah ckp jangan ikut.Aku dah agak nanti mesti kau bising."
"Aku tak kisah tunggu ikan,tapi bagi aku cuba lontar umpan pulak."
Naim menarik tali kailnya untuk meletak umpan baru,tanpa diendahnya ngomelan Amir.
"Weh.Buat tak dengar pulak.Kau jangan la berlagak sangat,kail rotan ja pon," Amir menambah.
"Kalau rotan saja pon,kenapa kau tak buat sendiri!?" Naim meninggi suara."Kau yang berlagak!"
"Ahh.Aku tak tahan dengan kau ni."Amir yang berbadan lebih besar mengambil kail Naim darinya,lalu di lontarnya mata kail ke air.Mat yang sebelum itu berbaring di atas tanah bangun dan melihat umpan itu pergi dan jatuh.Tepat di dalam rumpun pokok di tengah kali.
"Bodoh!Tengok apa kau dah buat!Mata kail tu dah sangkut.Baik kau pergi turun ambik."
Amir memalingkan badannya,melangkah meninggalkan dua orang budak itu.
"Bukan salah aku."
"Bodoh!" jerit Naim.
"Bukan salah aku" ulang Amir dari jauh.
Setelah di sumpahnya Amir,Naim cuba turun ke dalam kali.
"Mat,tolong aku kejap."
"Tak boleh la Naim.Mak aku suruh pergi kedai tadi," kata Mat sambil mengesat debu dari baju.
Naim mengeluh dan turun,diperhatikan Mat yang berdiri tetap di tepi tebing.Naim meredah perlahan-lahan,lumpur di dasar terkocak mengeruhkan air.Langsung tidak nampak kakinya,mahupun makhluk-makhluk di dalam air.Sedang Naim terpikirkan cerita tahyul dan tipu,terdengar dia suara dari tebing,lantas dia berpaling.
Mat masih berdiri dan menoleh serentak ke belakangnya.
Seorang lelaki kusut masai berdiri tegak.Badannya tegap tapi tidak terjaga,mukanya hitam dek berkeliaran di tengah hari tanpa keruan.Dia pun berkata,
"Tiada dapat ku kudap,namun apa kau mamah?
Biar di saring bagaimana,mana mungkin kita seiring langkah.
Patah buluh darahnya,baru disambung tali saudara"
"Okay la Naim.Aku balik dulu," cepat Mat melangkah menjauhi lelaki tersebut.Ikutkan hati,mahu saja Naim naik ikut tebing di hadapannya,tapi barangnya tertinggal di atas tebing di belakangnya,bersebelahan lelaki itu.Naim meredah balik,memanjat naik dan lelaki yang tadinya galak bersajak senyap sahaja.Melihatkan Naim susah untuk naik,lelaki tersebut menyuakan tangannya.Naim sambut pantas tapi cepat dia melepaskan tangannya dengan terkejut,hampir-hampir dia jatuh ke dalam kali.
"Mana jari kau?"terpacul soalan tersbut sebelum sempat Naim berfikir.
Lelaki itu merenung jari sendiri,kemudian perlahan-lahan riak muka dia berubah serius dan matanya kembali fokus.
"Aku hilang jari ni setahun dulu,tapi hari ini aku hilang lebih dari itu," jawab lelaki tersebut.Dilapnya muka sendiri,lelaki tersebut segera berjalan ke arah kampung."Aku pergi dulu."
"Kesian.."cakap Naim sendirian."Dah la gila,tak ada jari plak tu."
Naim tiba di rumah dan melihat emaknya tergesa-gesa bersiap.Ayahnya sudah lama siap dan pergi ke masjid.Namun selalu emaknya akan tinggal di rumah.Hanya kalau ada keramaian akan dia tinggalkan rumah,itupun di rangkainya Naim untuk ikut bersama.Lain pula hari ini.
"Naim.Nasi ada bawah tudung," emak Naim bercakap sambil bersiap.
"Tapi mak nak pergi mana?"
"Baca Yasin.Jangan lupa kunci rumah," pesan emaknya sambil menutup pintu.
"Baca sebab apa?" soal Naim,tapi soalannya itu tak terjawab,tidak sehingga dia teringatkan kata-kata lelaki gila tadi.
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